Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Captain_Spanky's LiveJournal:

[ << Previous 20 ]

Wednesday, January 28th, 2009
10:39 pm	Writer's Block: You Wouldn't Understand Almost everyone coins or uses expressions that make sense to only a few people. What word or phrase do you use most often that you have to explain the meaning of to others? View 500 Answers Pfft. That's not a word I made up, it's of an onamotapeic word, meant to sound like me blowing air out of my mouth. Why am I doing this? Because this question blows. Only two types of people use words that they have to explain to people a lot: inarticulate morons* and pretentious types. You know, the kind of person who'll use a word just so you'll ask what it means, roll their eyes and thenas smugly as possible say "Oh you don't know?".** However the issue of people inventing words is quite interesting. Neologisms (for that is what they are called) are words that are used but have not been accepted in to formal language. Rather ironically the word is itself a neologism, having been first used in 1803.*** Most people are probably familiar with my two favorites. Cromulant and embiggen, both first used in an episode of The Simpsons called "Lisa The Iconoclast". They've picked up steam over the years and now it's perfectly common to see thumbnails captioned "click to embiggin" on various websites, especially ones that have a more geeky audience. *Spelling mistakes don't count dammit. **Fuck you ***Thank you wikipedia. If you are wrong I will kill your first born (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, January 27th, 2009
3:21 pm	Writer's Block: Peevish Too many LJers to list have submitted this question—what is your biggest pet peeve? View 500 Answers In an effort to get back in to writing I will try answering these writer's block questions until my brain becomes a bit more unstuck. I'd rather not use this as an outlet to complain/brag about my life so I'm going to try and find more interesting things to do with a webpage that has my name attached. Ok, so pet peeves. As a general rule it's lying and rudeness. Not the swearing, cursing, middle finger type of rudeness, but the actual personal snubs that people do, either through selfishness, stupidity or malice. Same goes for lying really, which is really just a form of rudeness and mistrust. If you respect someone you don't lie to them. As an example I would say that 99% of the time if you think someone will get mad and you lie to someone to avoid that...I can guarantee they'll be even angrier once your little deception crumbles. It's easy to tell when someone's lying anyway, most people aren't particuarly good at it. There's the idea that if someone avoids your gaze when telling you something then they're lying. This is pretty much bullshit. Like a lot of shit though it started out as a meal of facts and has been digested by people. Of course when people digest something you're gonna end up with shit. Basically the best way to tell if someone is lying is by noticing a change in their natural behaviour. So if they always look you in the eye and are suddenly avoiding your gaze? Alarm bells should be ringing. Likewise if they never look at you, usually finding the wall over your shoulder an excellent focal point, and are suddenly staring through the little black holes in the centre of your peepers? Well they probably read the "avoid your gaze" factoid and are pretty obviously lying. You get the point though. This principle is actually how lie detectors work. They take a base reading of your body when being asked normal questions to which they know the answer to be a truth or a lie. By comparing these to readings from answers on which they're unsure they can tell if you're telling fibs. This is how Maury Pauvitch makes millions. Well that and pregnancy tests. Of course this all ties in to rudeness as a whole. You shouldn't be lying to your friends, nor should you be forgetting to keep them in the loop. You arrange to do something and can't make it? Cool, fine see you some other time. Just not turning up, or waiting till the last minute? Pretty uncool, not because of the messed up plans, but because it just shows a lack of respect for your friends. If you're going to miss a doctors appointment you'd tell them as soon as you know right? And your friends matter a lot more than your doctor. Bit of common sense is all it takes, but as life post university has taught me this i something a surprising amount of the population lacks. And there was me thinking it was just Uni kids. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, April 16th, 2008
6:01 pm	Everything Is Funny With Yakety Sax Also known as the Benny Hill theme. And yes, I am going to hell. (Comment on this)
Tuesday, October 16th, 2007
4:14 pm	Stuff And Nonsence Man I've not posted here in a while. Didn't have much to say really, as the summer was rather boring. Anyhoo things are a bit more interesting now. Firstly I have a job at Julian Graves. Yes the health food shop, and yes I am a fat bastard. It's a nice place to work though, couldn't ask for much better till monkey conditions as it is mostly quiet and I can get a lot of my own reading done. Which is useful due to... It's my dissertation semester. I'm doing it on Watchmen by Alan Moore and it's impact on comic books, as well as a bit of comic book history. Should be a lot of fun, the guy in charge of the dissertation module seemed to like it, but then again he IS world Tintin champion 1987. Worryingly he said I'll almost certainly get an excellent mark or a terrible one and I quote "So at least you don't have to worry about being average". So no pressure or anything. Still it's something I'm really interested in which helps. Lots of good music about right now, too much to talk about really. Feel free to ask though, I've been loving the more extreme bounds of avante gard recently - uneXpect, Sleepytime Gorilla Museum, Sunn O))), AKLO etc. And yes I am just name dropping, but fuck you. As I said I'm reading a lot, mostly graphic novels and comic books in an attempt to have as wider understanding of the genre as possible. The Dark Knight Returns is good, although the art was a bit meh in my opinion. And it was very much a proto-Sin City in a lot of ways. The Long Halloween is EXCELLENT as it basically explains how Gotham went from normal criminals to being controlled by freaks. Very nicely done. Just finished "Black And Blue" by Iain Rankin and although long winded it was rather tasty. Finally got the Wii connected to the internet so I've been playing a load of Virtual Console stuff now, which is nice. Mainly the previously unreleased in the UK "Sin And Punishment" which is like every anime ever condensed into a 3 act, hour and a half shooter. It plays a bit like 3D Gunstar Heroes, unsurprising considering it's a Treasure game. Oh and don't buy Super Paper Mario, it's gash and boring. Finally I went to Dream Theater last week and had a blast, which is more than I thought I would. I head banged like a mother fucker, jumped, sang and had a two man mosh pit with Mike. Was very careful not to bother the more sedate crowd members (but really who goes to a concert just to stand with thier arms crossed and a bored look on their face?). On the coach back to St Andrews it turns out one of the first years was a proper, dyed in the wool, walking cliche DT fan. He literally said "I can't believe you guys headbanged, it's no wonder DT never play scotland. You were disrespectful and embarressing. You should have been standing appriciating the music. You should have been watching John Pattruchi PLAY man. Real music fans don't need mindless violence to enjoy themselves". I laughed in his face. I mean REALLY. Oh and boozeday tuesday tonight? (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, July 27th, 2007
9:28 am	Scottish Rap Rather self explanitory really. Pretty awesome though. Can't wait for the album. (Comment on this)
Monday, June 11th, 2007
3:57 pm	So yeah, I don't update much, no matter. Thinking of deleting this bad boy, and replacing it with another. Mainly so future employers etc don't google my name and instantly discover what a cunt I am. Thoughts? What name should I choose (I have a few in mind) (Comment on this)
Wednesday, January 24th, 2007
4:27 am	24 If you watch 24 you NEED to hunt down the first 4 episodes online. Watch out for spoilers, check www.alluc.org and www.peekvid.com, but watch them. The latest, episode 4, is the single most dramatic, heartbreaking and epic episode of 224 in the shows history. More so than hour 24 of series 1, 12 of 3, whichever one Ryan was in 3, and of course 12 in series 5. I woke Lou up by screaming "OH MY FUCKING GOD" at one point, and she went back to sleep only for me to do it again 5 minutes later. Just like Joe and his Stephan Segall movies in Family Guy. Fucking awesome. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, December 25th, 2006
2:54 am	Fuck It Merry Christmas/Winter Solstice. Anyone who's on here knows I love them. You all contribute to my life in a significant way, and I hope today is good to you, as is new year. Those of you that I'll see soon: I look forward to it. Those of those I won't: It's been too long. (Comment on this)
Saturday, December 2nd, 2006
3:26 pm	All the cool kids are doing it. (Comment on this)
Saturday, November 18th, 2006
4:18 pm	Hippies Silly hippies, watching too much V For Vendetta. Bolloks I say, people should bloody well be afraid of their government! (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, October 30th, 2006
3:05 am	What the fuck? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XJaGScKpZuU&mode=related&search= N.B. This is a real advert. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, October 26th, 2006
12:04 pm	I Have No Mouth, And I Must Scream In the spirit of Halloween (not long, yay XD) I present to you the following short story, called "I Have No Mouth, And I Must Scream": http://www.scifi.com/scifiction/classics/classics_archive/ellison/ellison1.html I read it last night and it's stuck in my mind ever since. Really disturbing stuff, and really really good. Enjoy. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Sunday, October 22nd, 2006
10:27 pm	It's Not A Fashion Statement It's A Fucking Deathwish Alright dudes, not updated for a while so I thought I'd let you know what's up. Lately I've been very busy, but everything is *mostly* a lot of fun. I mean I only have like 2 nights a eek free, but what the hell? The whole presidentail buisness is a lot harder than I thought, but I'm enjoying the challenge. Had a few diplomatic pressures, and the union are, as usual, being complete fuck sticks, but what can you do? By fuck sticks I mean doing things like: losing equipment we need, hiring out the room when we've already booked it, and generally making it so that I have to kick up a fuss to get anything done. Other than that Rocksoc is a fucking blast, excedt for one issue which I'll get to presently. The whole scouting thing is fucking great. In case you don't know I'm training to be a scout master, and it's great. Again, more work than I thought, but still really rewarding. The kids are great, although typical 10-12 year olds. I.e. cheeky, sometimes insightful, and often cute as buttons. The training part is also fun, but time consuming, taking up to 2 and a half hours on a tuesday night. This week it's the history of scouting which should be fun. My job is getting better too, my boss is being a lot nicer to me and my shifts have gotten more flexible. I guess she heard I was going to quit and as I am how one of the more senior team mebers after only two and a half months is obviously trying to get me to stay. Probably not going to happen though. But I have learned an important lesson: as with all things in life it all comes down to attitude. As soon as I stopped being so fucking stressed/nervous/pissed off at work the whole thing just became easier. So there we go. I've also just got a new laptop, should be delivered via Woolworths in the next week. It's shiny and will play games. On the music front my guitars are still at home, as is the bass, but I've got some kick ass new albums. Trivium's latest is fucking killer and kicks the living shit out of their touring partners latest (Iron Maiden's AMOLAD if you don't know). Also I don't get the fuss being made, HEafy's vocals are pretty damn similar to what they used to be, almost a merger of his screams and melodic singing and work well, and the riffing is pretty much the same style as ever, just in standard insted of drop d. All that's happened is they've matured a bit as song writers. Ripping off Metallica my ass. Also it has some of the best choruses on the planet. Cradle's new one, Thornography, is also a pleasant surprise. The pre-release songs didn't fill me with confidence, but after almost universal praise as their best since Midian I got it. Cheap too, only £8.99. Anyway it's like Cradle sure, but it's definately their most experimental work and probably the one most likely to be enjoyed by non Cradle fans. It features the following elements that have not really been shown before: A thrash based riffing style, even more so than on DAAD, real honest to God guitar solos, backing vocals by Villie Valo (and not in the most obvious way), a fucking full band instrumental, a stlightly catchier song writing style (not poppy mind, there's just something about the songs that sticks in the brain), goddamn CLEAN vocals from Dani (think a more melodic version of his growls. We're not talking Trivium style harmony here) aaaaaand a cover of an 80s gay anthem(!). If that doesn't make you curious to here the album then nothing will. It's a fucking cracker and although the usual quaters will cry sell out, I think it's just a really excellent COF album. If you're a fan I suggest you buy it, if you're not I suggest borrowing it, loving it and buying your own copy. Back to Rocksoc (as everything in life tends to do) and it's the now classic Haloween party on Saturday. Featuring male, female, group and least effort prizes, as well as a pumpkin carving competition I expect you all to be there and in costume too! Kaleb will also be featuring so it'll surely be a kick ass night. Oh and on Friday night Lou and I are going to TRHPS dressed as Brad and Janet, in white underwear and lab coats! Fun fun fun. And now the serious issue. There's been a serious problem of drink spiking at Rocksoc over the last year, and at the last event I'm fairly certain I was spiked. I took £10 with me, spent 9-10 PM on the door, and had change the next morning, yet I can't remeber a thing after 10. And I have NEVER had a full on blackout from alcohol EVER. If I can't remeber stuff it usually comes back eventually and this time nothing caused me to recall what happened. I also threw up in my sleep, something I've also never done. It's all very suspicious, so I urge everyone to keep an eye on their drinks at Rocksoc. Sadly we have been deemed an easy target, and I guess I can see why. A heavy drinking culture so people acting v. drunk is expected, and people think nothing of leaving their drinks unattended to get up and dance. So basically if you can keep an eye on your own drinks, and their friends while they're dancing it'd be great, as so far nothing bad has happened to those who've got spiked, but it might, and that would be just about the worst thing I could think of. In the words of the great Jerry Springer: Take care of yourself, and each other. Oh and I'm last setting on Thursday and planning jack shit, as I prefer "seat of your pants DJing" as a wise man once called it. But if you make some requests I'll probably stick them on. If I have them, or I can hear them at least once in advance. (9 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, September 18th, 2006
10:39 am	My head Is a little sore. Good start to eshers week though, nay a great one. Spent the evening in the whey pat drinking beer and the odd blacktooth grin. Afterwards I tried to steal a b+b sign, hid in a cupboard and under a bed, and mocked some poser idiots I went to school with. All in all a good night. And so the week continues. Later today - Scissor Sisters. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, September 12th, 2006
4:51 pm	An update I am pierced, check me out. ( A TMNT reference should be here. ) (11 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, September 11th, 2006
12:34 am	So it comes to this After two years of fucking selfish juvanille bullsht my mum has kicked my dad out the house. For looking at porn no less. Fucking gay bullshit. I feel sorry for Cameron, only hope he can get the fuck away from her crazy bullshit and soon. Gaylords. Current Mood: Faggots (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, September 9th, 2006
6:33 pm	So this is my life now... Unbelievably I was an hour late for work today. I thought I started at 12, but apparantly I started at 11. And cos my phone was off (misplaced charger) I didn't get their calls. So my boss was pleased with me when I strolled in at 11:55 looking dead chuffed because I thought I was early for a change. Bummer. Also it was hella-busy, but apparantly not still as busy as a "busy" Saturday. Either that was a bluff or I should wear stain proof pants to work from now on. Secondly I have, after much umming and ahhing and "mmmmmmmmmm"-ing I have decided to move house. Flossy, unsurprisingly, took it badly. Partly because she and I got our wires crossed, partly because she likes to be angry, partly because I didn't find out I was moving out until last minuite. But I imagine she'll get over it. Hope so anyway. Anyway so that means I'm up the ziggeraut likety split, out of shithole Mcdrugden south street, off to "holy shit it's a real fucking house" out by Morrisons, at 23 Crawford gardens. Fucking beauty too, patio, garden, living room, dining room, kick ass kitchen. And I'm living with two very kick ass people, Elz and Vikky. Fuck yeah. Party anyone? I don't move in until the 15th, and until then I'm staying with Lube. Finally I have decided to get pierced on monday. I'm thinking either a Mike Patton style eyebrow ring or a Robert Flynn style septum ring. I'm leaning towards the latter which (with the aid of one of Lou's rings) looks like this: So it's up to you, yes, YOU to help decide which piercing I get done. If you have strong feelings either way then leave a comment. Or comment anyway, you know I love that. (10 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, September 6th, 2006
8:45 pm	This Just In: I'm an Arrogant Prick Who Hates The Homeless My Personality Neuroticism 43 Extraversion 99 Openness To Experience 94 Agreeableness 54 Conscientiousness 36 Test Yourself Compare Yourself View Full Report MySpace Codes, MySpace Layouts and hi5 by Pulseware Survey Software "You feel superior to those around you and sometimes tend to be seen as arrogant by other people. You are not affected strongly by human suffering, priding yourself on making objective judgments based on reason. You are more concerned with truth and impartial justice than with mercy." HAHAHAHAHAHAH! OH YEAH! (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, August 28th, 2006
8:42 pm	Reply and I'll give you a letter. You then have to find five songs that start with that letter and post them to your journal. My songs: Filthy/Gorgeous - Scissor Sisters My favourite song by one of the best pop groups about. Also flat out one of my favourite songs. Great to dance to. And dirty as fuck. Final Product - Nevermore Just got in to this NWOAHM band, courtesy of Matt, and they are most certainly riff-tastic. A few power metal influences, but darker and heavier than that genre. Catchy, kick ass headbanging fun. Future Breed Machine - Meshuggah A great song by one of the heaviest bands on the planet. Crazy jazz influenced drumming, bizarre time signitures, and off time riffing all topped off by a a crazy robotic bark. Sounds like the music the Cyberdyne computers listened to as they destroyed mankind. 43% Burnt - The Dillinger Escape Plan If Meshuggah are one of the heaviest bands on the planet then DEP ARE the heaviest band on the planet. Fucked up hardcore punk meets avant garde jazz. Absolutly crazy shit, indescribable really, and a fucking great live show. This is from their first album and sports more of a jazz influence than their later work. Enjoy From Out Of Nowhere - Faith No More A great song by THE greatest band to ever walk the earth. The track that introduced everyone to Mike Patton, from the album that has influenced almost everyone who heard it. I love this song, and I love this band. (8 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, August 23rd, 2006
10:33 am	Revolver Lou and I watched Revolver last night and it was awesome in many many ways. Great characters, interesting premise, and a very engaging plot. Confusing as fuck, but that's part of it's charm. I know loads of people avoided it because critics said it was "confusing and pretentious" but really it's only one of these. And I'm sure with repeated viewings that will fade. Kudos to guy Ritchie for trying something new (the film is neither a comedy, a farce nor an action film). So yeah go rent/by (it's cheap) then help me figure it out. Besides, you only get better by playing a stronger opponent. (2 Comments |Comment on this)